Don’t Waste Your Time With Craigslist

The past few weeks I have been doing some research on the Craigslist personals section, to see whether it’s a fertile environment to find women to cheat on your girlfriend with. I had done this a year earlier and come up with a resounding “NO!” I figured I’d give it a year and revisit the site to see if it had improved any.

Friends and coworkers occasionally mention it so I thought it was gaining traction in the online dating arena, hopefully becoming more legitimate.

But after my latest two week foray into the Craigslist personals I can whole honestly say that it’s a waste of your time. But this goes not only for cheaters but for any guy looking to meet a woman period.

The Craigslist personals are a breeding ground for spammers, men posing as women, overweight unattractive women (my bad Big Beautiful Women or BBW) demanding the moon, and in some cases even blatant offers of prostitution.

Here is the breakdown:

65 % Spammers
They put up posts/ads posing to be women in order for you to write back so they can acquire your email address. Then they reply with either a fake email asking you to go to some online dating website where you can continue the conversation. Or they just email you links to porn sites… and not very good ones either, I know I’ve checked, it’s called research, he he he.

15% Guys Posing as Women
Guys put up fake posts posing as women as a joke to see how many men reply, or they do it with a picture of their ex to get even.

15% Big Beautiful Women (BBW)
BBW 's love to put up posts/ads demanding unrealistic expectations. Here’s a clue ladies; if you’re not getting it in the real world posting an ad is not going to get you a date with Brad Pitt. You need to lower your expectations and stop wasting everyone’s time with your unfulfilled fantasies.

5% Prostitutes
I was as surprised to find this type of posts/ads on Craigslist Personals. I thought they would better monitor this type of activity. Usually they aren’t asking for payment in Dollars, they ask for it in Roses. But you think a little bit and you’ll realize 1 Rose = 1 Dollar, you do the math. Also there are quite a lot of ads for women looking to be companions of affluent older men, can you say escort service?

I spent most of my time on the Women Seeking Men, and the Casual Encounters sections. I did delve a little bit into the Strictly Plutonic section, but found that the demands of the “women” there were even more outrageous than those of the BBW’s? They want to be taken out, wined and dined, have presents bought for them, taken on lavish trips or concerts but refuse to put out and they let you know about that ahead of time. So I didn’t even waste my time in that section, nor should you.

In the end the title of this blog says it all… Don’t Waste Your Time With Craigslist.

Take Care,

A.C.


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Where Not to Meet Women

In my latest series How to Meet Women (To Cheat On Your Girlfriend With) I’ve shared with you my favorite techniques and approaches to meeting new women.

But equally as important is to know the circumstances where the women you meet should be considered off limits. Separating the viable opportunity from the risky one will keep your relationship with your girlfriend intact.


Where Not to Meet Women

At Work
First and foremost you do not want to date women from work; this is a good rule to follow whether you want to make her your girlfriend or just keep her for the occasional Nooner. Any woman you work with has access to you for eight hours a day, minimum. She has access to the people you work with who can overhear telephone conversations, and if she is sneaky enough she can have access to your emails. Also, if you want to go on a lunch date with another woman it will be much more of a hassle to get away. If you receive any special cards for you birthday, or if one of your other women decides to stop by to "surprise" you, it could lead to an ugly altercation. All of which could have easily been prevented by abstaining from a workplace relationship.

I personally have been in this predicament and I can strongly advise you that it’s not worth the headache, no matter how attractive she might be.

Through Your Girlfriend
Never under any circumstances cheat on your girlfriend with a woman that you met through your girlfriend; common sense right? But so many guys have been caught for this reason alone that it bears mentioning.

Even if this woman is just an acquaintance of your girlfriend, you have to remember most women cannot keep a secret, that’s a fact. Now you’re asking them to conceal one of the juiciest secrets in existence.

Besides that, there are other reasons to consider. Have you ever thought about why a friend of your girl’s might want to sleep with you? Is it since you’re so charming, handsome and alluring that she just can’t help herself? Maybe, if you’re in that 1% of the male population.

More than likely she is doing it for her own personal reasons; that might include the always popular revenge/get even/screw your girlfriend over maneuver. Women are cruel this way and you are just a tool for her to get back at your girlfriend. Obviously this can only work if you girlfriend finds out about it, and guess who is going to tell her?

A second scenario might be that the friend was in a distraught emotional condition and needed someone to comforted her (you), got caught up in the moment and had sex with you because you were there for her. When she comes to her senses and realizes this, she will feel even worse than before. Now she has this guilt hanging over her, which will eventually spill out to your girlfriend. Most women cannot keep guilty feelings like that bottled up, so hooking up way is a recipe to get caught.

A third motive could be that your girlfriend’s friend is trying to break up your relationship for her own selfish reasons. Whether to get you to be her boyfriend (which is poor judgment since you already proved to her that you aren’t the faithful type, but women still try this method anyway), or because she doesn’t like you dating her friend and doesn’t want you around. She can always tell your girlfriend that she was drunk and you took advantage of her to try and preserve their friendship but still get you out of the picture. Not as a viable motive as getting you for herself, but I have seen it on occasion, either way you still get caught, that’s the main point.

Even if the friend/acquaintance is somehow able to keep the secret, then every social occasion that attends along with you and your girlfriend will be under a fog of anxiety and awkwardness for the two of you trying to pretend nothing happened. This isn’t a pleasant situation, as you can imagine.

So my best advice to you is not to cheat with one of your girlfriend’s friends. There are plenty of complete strangers out there that you can hookup with, without the rigmarole that accompanies this situation.

Through Family
Avoid getting hooked up through your family, especially since family always knows your personal business. For example, let’s assume that your Aunt introduced you to her neighbor’s daughter, who you promptly nailed on the first date. Unbeknown to your Aunt is the fact that you have Girlfriend. Now your Aunt is all excited about her love connection and calls up your Mom to tell her the good news and inevitably your Mom spills the beans about your Girlfriend. Now your Aunt is torn between her dual obligations, to you and to her neighbor’s daughter. Eventually the truth will come out because your Aunt is a nice lady and doesn’t want to anyone to get hurt. So now you have an angry neighbor’s daughter on your hands, and the fact that you have to worry about your Aunt telling your Girlfriend at the next family function.

Try to avoid family match making at all costs. You do not need any more stress than you already have, especially from your family. You’re family should be your escape from your relationship rather than part of the problem.

Take Care,

A.C.

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How To Meet Women in Bars and Clubs (You Can Cheat On Your Girlfriend with)

Continuing my series on How To Meet Women (You Can Cheat On Your Girlfriend with) today I will discuss on a more traditional method, something we all have experience with… the Bar and Club scene.

Bars and Clubs
Rule number one is going to a place that is not frequented by your girlfriend, or her friends. Simple enough, but you can’t imagine how many guys have been tripped up by ignoring this rule. If you do go to a place your girlfriend likes, simply take the night off and don’t pick up on any women, just have fun with your friends. There is no reason to tempt fate.

Go to nightspots that are preferably out of your area or better yet out of your girlfriend's area. This will lead to reduced geographical complications, meaning that there will be a reasonable distance separating you from your girlfriend. Also, this will create a geographical buffer with any women you might meet at that nightspot since these women will most likely be from the locality of the venue and not from your area.

Try to avoid making out, or exhibiting overt affection openly in public places since you never know who else is there (co worker, friend of your girlfriend’s, etc.) that you might have not noticed or recognized. You can explain away dancing with a woman and talking to her, if it’s reported to your girlfriend. You can pull the old wingman excuse “you were just trying to be polite while your friend tried to hook up with her friend.” Don’t forget to make sure to say how much you disliked playing this role and how disinterested you were in the girl. But if you’re showing overt affection, you cannot explain away kissing and groping another woman, so maintain some semblance of self control.

Don’t give out your phone number to a woman until you have somewhat of a background on her. Where she’s from, where she works, what she does for a living, you know the basics. This will give you a general idea whether thee is any remote chance of her crossing paths with your girlfriend.

Also make sure that you use an alias, especially if its shaping up to be a one night stand, then she doesn’t need to know your real name since you have no intention of extending your interaction with her.

As to the actual how to pick up on a woman at a bar or club, you should already know that.But if that’s not your strength I’ll give you some tips that can get the ball rolling.

1. Don’t offer to buy her a drink.
This is probably the most played out method there is to get a woman to notice you. If you need to buy her something to get her attention, then you might as well hand her the money and walk away. I watched tons of guys try this over the years, and just laughed. Waited for them to pay for the drink, then I just came up on her other side and worked my way into the conversation. The sad part is when the other guy has to watch me get her phone number right in front of him, while she sips on the drink he just bought her. Ouch.

2. Say anything to get the conversation started.
It’s not that hard, ask her about her outfit, compliment her shoes or hair (women love that shit) or just start a random discussion about something going on at the bar/club. The point is to get her talking, the topic is really irrelevant.

3. Get on her team.
If you see her turning down a lot of men, that’s a perfect opportunity for you to get on her team. Start asking her what was wrong with the last couple of guys, why did she turn them down? Then transition the conversation into what type of guy she’s looking for, and then pick out some goofballs that are exact opposite that you two can make fun of together. Building camaraderie will go along way to establishing a rapport, plus she’ll be curious as to why you’re not trying to pick up on her, but the jokes on her cause you already are.

Those are probably my three favorite ways to meet women at a bar or club. You don’t have to come up with an elaborate scheme, after all these women are already alcoholically lubricated and waiting for you to make a move.

If you have a favorite pick up technique for meeting women in a bar or club, please feel free share it with the rest of us, no need to hold out.

Take Care,

A.C.

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How To Meet Women In Chat Rooms

In my last blog I addressed How To Meet Women on MySpace and other Social Networking Sites.

The series continues with this installment covering an old favorite of mine, Chat Rooms.

Chat Rooms
Chat rooms were once the hottest and hippest way to connect online since they are readily accessible to anyone with an Internet connection. But with the advent of online dating and the social networking sites discussed in previous blogs, chat rooms have lost their luster in the eyes of the online dating crowd crowd. Pay no attention to that, chat rooms are still a very fertile ground for meeting women; you just need to find the right venue.

You should find a local chat room near your area and explore it. I recommend MySpace (www. MySpace.com) chat rooms as well as Yahoo (www.Yahoo.com) for this since they have set up an extensive chat network covering all areas of the US and overseas where you can narrow down your chatting to your nearest metropolitan city such as Los Angeles or New York.

What you should do is set up two chat identities, one to go into the chat rooms and browse the selection of women, and one to actually chat with. The reason for this is your browsing identity will only have the basics of the profile information filled out, with no picture, since anyone in the chat room can view it. You want to do this since you never know which one of your girlfriend's friends, co-workers, or family members could be in that same chat room and recognize you by looking at your profile. The second identity you set up, will be used to chat with women whose profiles you have found attractive, whose photo’s you have seen (note: never waste your time on a girl with no picture, usually there is a reason for that), and identified as a potential candidate of interest.

This second identity will have all your vital profile information filled out with a photo, giving the women a chance to be dazzled by your good looks. When you get into a chat room take your time and search through all the profiles to select the girl(s) you might be interested in. Contact these women with a private message using that second profile identity we discussed and engage them in a conversation.

Keep an eye on the main chat screen while you’re engaged in your private conversation. Do this to determine which girls are regulars in this room. You want to know who the regulars are because there are some women that spend an inordinate amount of time in these chat rooms and develop an extensive network of chat friends. If you end up talking to one of these women the entire chat room will know by the end of the day that you are trying to hook up with her. These women are best left avoided since gossip runs rampant in chat rooms, and the last thing you need is an entire room full of regulars talking about you and some chat room chick. The way to determine if a female chatter is a regular is to watch the conversations in the main chat room. If she seems to know more than three people in that room she qualifies. Another identifying trait is if she is involved in discussions about personal issues that the other chatters seem to have intimate knowledge of. Now you know who to stay away from.

Also there are different types of women in these rooms at different times during the day. You might want to be aware of this since it will provide you with different opportunities. During the day you have slightly older women, mid twenties and up, they are professionals and are bored at work. You also have students who are home from class, and unemployed women who hang out at home. At night you have a mixed bag of every age and economic condition, and usually more women to choose from as well, many of them like to spend their time chatting on their off hours.

Meeting women this way is very easy, you should private message the ones you're interested in giving them a simple compliment on their pretty smile and referring to something in their profiles. This will show your interest in more than just a conversation but not make you seem like a stalker. Don’t come off too strong just make it very casual, since the average chat room guy has the charm and finesse of a toilet seat, this approach will make you stand out on its own. They will usually thank you and then you can follow that up with some pleasant chatter showing your charm and wit, which is sorely lacking in the rest of the men she has been chatting with. If the conversation has gone well but is winding down you will have the urge to ask for her phone number, don't do this the first time you talk. Every chat room guy she has already spoken with that day has asked for her number, so you want to differentiate yourself. Just ask her politely if you can add her to your friend list and that you hope you can talk to her again some time. This way you can talk to her on another occasion when she comes online in the future, as well as monitor her chat habits. By the fourth or fifth time you talk to her, she will be freely offering her number to you wondering when you will call. Once you two are talking on the phone you can follow your usual routine on setting up a date.

I will continue this series on how to meet women that you can cheat on your girlfriend with in my next blog when I cover the traditional bar and club scene.

Let me know if I missed anything vital, feel free to email me.

Take Care,

A.C.


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How To Meet Women On MySpace

In my last blog I began a series on How to Meet Women to Cheat On Your Girlfriend With.
The series continues with this installment covering social networking sites.

Online Social Networking Sites
Originally established to promote networking through friends and acquaintances, most of these sites have evolved into nothing more than glorified free online dating sites where people hook up through friends. The basic premise is to meet people through your network of friends, making these people your new friends and increasing your personal network of friends.

The advantage is an opportunity to look through your friends’ collection of friends and get introduced (either online or at a future social function) to women. You already know something about them having read their profile so you have topics of discussion readily available.
The cons of this type of approach are that these women all have some sort of connection to one or more of your friends, making it hard for you to hide the fact that you’re already in a relationship, or that you have a reputation for being a player. If you do hook up with a woman, chances are it will get around her network of friends and then reach your network of friends as well, increasing your chances of getting caught.

There is however a third alternative for this particular venue, which is very much like the online personals. Simply message women you have no attachments to, and no mutual friends in common with. Just create a search criteria of what you’re looking for (age, distance, etc.), when the search results come back hunt through the results to find what you like. Then click on her profile and check to see if you have any friends in common. If there aren’t any, then you’re most likely in the clear, however you would be wise to message women living out of your immediate area so you can have some distance.

The two Online Networking Sites I recommend are http://www.myspace.com/ and http://www.friendster.com/, in that order. Both have free memberships available and boast a variety of features. I suggest joining both and spending some time familiarizing yourself with their tools and options. To successfully start an online dialogue with women using this venue you can try an assortment of methods to see which one works best for you. The methods that generate the most response involve asking a question regarding some item in the woman’s profile, something that lets her know you took the time to read what she had to say, same as with the online personals.

Friendster provides a useful tool that allows you to see who looked at your profile, with the caveat that you’re profile voyeurism is exposed as well (this function can be turned off, however then you cannot see who viewed your profile). On the surface this might appear to be a deterrent, but there is a clever way of using this to your advantage. If you’re hesitant to start a dialogue with a particular woman, but you still find her attractive make sure you cruise her profile. If she has the “view profile” function turned on she will obviously know that you’ve checked her out. At this point one of three things can happen; nothing, she looked at your picture and found you uninteresting and never looked at your profile. She views your profile but doesn’t send you any response. This is a golden opportunity for you to start a conversation by sending her a message about how you saw her checking out your profile, include the usual email conversation starters using something from her profile. Or she responds with a message and then the conversation is started for you. Another opener is sending a “smile” to the girl who you’re interested in. It is relatively easy since it only involves a couple of mouse clicks.

MySpace works very similarly to Friendster, sans the “who viewed my profile” tool. However, MySpace allows you access to a much larger and more a varied user base, provides better video and audio uploads capabilities, far greater profile customization, and most importantly, allows you to segment your search much more exclusively, almost like an online personals site, so it definitely has the advantage there. Overall MySpace provides a far superior venue to meet women online, and I recommend you start there.

Considering the price of these venues (free), as well as the access to thousands of women 24 hours a day, it is one of the best values for your investment. As with online dating/personals sites the quality of your profile has a major impact on your success. Posting attractive clear pictures of yourself, writing a charming and articulate profile including an invite for anyone (not just women, so you don’t give the impression you’re only there to hook up) to freely message you, and ensuring a few intriguing facts on how you like to spend you free time will increase the amount of interest you generate.

I will continue this series on how to meet women that you can cheat on your girlfriend with in my next blog when I cover the old but still reliable Chat Room… Stay Tuned!

Let me know if I missed anything vital, feel free to email me.

Take Care,
A.C.

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How to Meet Women Who You Can Cheat On Your Girlfriend With

Meeting women is probably the easiest part of cheating on your girlfriend. There are a multitude of resources you can explore in making the acquaintances of new women. I suggest, like a good investment portfolio, you diversify. Try incorporating various methods to keep a good mix, and to keep you out of the same social circles. The less you are remembered or known, the less likely you are to be discovered.

With the internet taking the forefront in personal interaction you would have to be a fool not to take advantage of it. It provides a plethora of opportunities to meet women quickly with minimum effort. Not to mention that by using online methods you can remain far more inconspicuous allowing you more discretion.

Today I will be discussing the benefits of online personal or dating sites, here’s why:


Online Personals Ads/Dating Sites
Online dating sites are an excellent source to meet women that you can safely approach without much worry of getting caught. Sometimes there is a stigma attached to meeting people through personal ads but you should disregard that. That might have been the case during the early days of online dating, but now online personals are an accepted way for busy, ambitious, highly motivated singles to meet. You can search through these online ads for free, find out what the women look like, where they are from, and what they are looking for. But to contact them you need to set up your own personal ad and pay a monthly fee, something nominal ranging from $20 to $25 a month, this is very affordable in comparison to the alternative. If you calculate that going to a club or a bar you would usually spend that much in a cover charge and a drink and most likely meet only one or two women, this is a great way to get a bang for your buck, pun intended. Just remember that you need to make your personal ads hidden or designate them un-searchable since you never know which one of your girlfriend's co-workers, friends, or family members might be browsing through this service as well.

There are two online dating/personals web sites I recommend, Yahoo (www.yahoo.com) and Match (www.match.com). These two services give you the widest variety of women in your particular area; you can narrow your search down by your ZIP Code, as well as a multitude of other of wide ranging search criteria that you can customize. Contacting women from these online dating services doesn't take much effort as long as you have a good initial introduction and a recent photo of yourself that gives them an accurate portrayal of what you look like. You need to be eloquent, charming, and come off sounding intelligent. Always give a small compliment about the woman's appearance, something along the lines of a pretty smile or beautiful eyes, and then leave it alone after that. Guys that fawn over a woman telling them in extensive prose how beautiful she is come off looking either desperate or just interested in her looks only, thus equated with looking only for sex. Neither perception will get you too many replies.


It’s important to keep in mind that most of the women on these dating sites are usually looking for one of two things; either a committed relationship, or a man that they can casually date with no strings attached (have sex with). You need to tailor your introduction towards whichever category they fall into. Tell them what caught your attention in their profile and that you were impressed by that. Mention that you are looking for the same thing(s) establishing a common bond between the two of you. Then spend a paragraph telling her a little bit about yourself, things that you didn't include in your profile. Then include a couple of questions that show your interest in getting to know her better, which also might provoke a response just to provide the answers, finish off with a 'looking forward to hearing from you," and you're done. You will usually receive a response within the next week. If not, then just leave it alone and move to the next woman, don't bother them with repeated emails. This will separate you from the rest of the men lacking the proper online etiquette that send multiple responses. Once a woman responds, you will more than likely trade emails for while before she decides to trust you with her phone number. You might spend a few days to a week talking on the phone before you should ask her to meet you. This is always a little awkward since you have gotten to know each other over the phone, but have never seen each other in person. Both of you will wonder whether you will find the other attractive physically since all you know of their looks are the photos they have provided. To overcome this initial awkwardness always schedule a fast first meeting like a lunch or coffee which allows for both parties to escape quickly after an hour or so if one doesn’t find the other person enticing.

After the initial meeting you can follow the usual methods that you are using, now that you have meet and the first time awkwardness has been conquered it becomes a normal relationship.

I will continue this series on how to meet women that you can cheat on your girlfriend with in my next blog when I address social networking sites such as MySpace and Friendster… Stay Tuned!

Thanks
A.C.

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