A Day In the Life of a Cheater

Occasionally, I have readers write me asking what it's like to date multiple women at the same time. I've tried to think of way that I could capture the life of a cheater, to try to make it interesting enough of a read while conveying the rigors and challenges involved with the deception and the management of both your time and the volatile personalities of your women.

What I came up with was simplest example I could give you to portray the life of a cheater; a day in my life.

Last Friday…

5:45 am
Wake up.

7:00 am
Leave the house

7:30 am
Arrive at work.

8:00 am
Email my girlfriend, my secondary woman, and my booty call from separate, non work email accounts. Set up the weekend rotation to split my time accordingly witch each woman.

12:30 pm
Meet with my #2 girl for lunch to appease her, since I won't be seeing her again till Sunday afternoon sometime. We mess around a little in the parking lot, and almost get caught by the Parking Lot Attendant. Lunch time thrills make for quick second half of the work day, unfortunately it wasn't a Nooner.

2:45 pm
Back at the office I call my girlfriend and finalize our plans for that evening. We'll be having dinner and then catch a movie, just a little something chill after a long week of work. I like to keep my Friday's low key since the rest of my week is usually pretty convoluted.

3:15 pm
Throughout the day I'm emailing with my booty call trying to arrange sometime to meet up over the weekend. She wants to hook up tonight, but that's a no go since I already got plans with my girl, as you know. Trying to fit each other into our respective schedules is tricky, especially since she has a boyfriend that's kind of clingy. She emails me back telling me that she'll have some time Saturday afternoon when her man has to take his little brother to a basketball camp. We agree on the time, and I begin formulating my alibi in case my girlfriend or my secondary woman ask me what my plans are during that time.

4:00 pm
I'm off of work, now my weekend will start to get interesting.

4:26 pm
My #2 girl calls and says she wants to see me tonight, some sort of bullshit about missing me after our lunch date. I tell her I can't because I have plans with the boys tonight, but she is insistent in a way only whiny woman can be. I break and agree to go see her before I get home. I re-route my car to her apartment and wonder what the hell she is doing home from work so early. I don't like a sudden change in my women's schedule, makes it hard to plan around.

5:06 pm
I arrive at her apartment, turn my phone on silent in case my girlfriend calls me while I'm there. As I'm walking to her apartment I change my mind, return to my car and leave my phone there. I'm not planning to be there long no need to take a chance. I'm always paranoid that one of my women will get a hold of my phone and go through my recent call logs, even though I got their names under an alias.

5:12 pm
I knock on her door and wait for her to open it. She looks a little distraught but I don't want to open that conversation so I act like I don't notice it. She pays that no mind and engages in it anyway. She wants to "talk," which is always code for it's going to take a while, especially when a woman says that. I don't have time for it though, I have to get home and get ready for my date with my girlfriend.

5:45 pm
I been humoring her for twenty something minutes now, listening to her concerns about our relationship not progressing. I'm waiting for it to end but it's just drawing on and on. I wish I could tell her that relationship will remain in a holding pattern, but I just don't have the time to get into it. I tell her she has raised some good points and that I will have to think about it. This doesn't sit well with her; she wants to address the issue right then and there. I tell I have to go and she gets pissed, but I have no choice I'm already behind schedule as it is.

6:10 pm
I leave on a bad note, but sacrifices have to be made. I get to my car check my phone and sure enough my girlfriend has left me a message after a couple of missed calls. She lets me know she has changed the restaurant she wants to go to and we need to be there half an hour earlier that originally planned. This condenses my allotment of time to get ready, lucky me.

6:20 pm
My #2 girl keeps calling me, but I'm letting it go to voice mail so I don't have to deal with her. If I pick up the phone now it will be a continuation of what happened at her apartment; her bitching me tuning her out.

6:42 pm
I arrive at my house, jump in the shower, get dressed, and I'm out the door in 20 minutes flat. Luckily I have perfected the quick change thanks to all my years of juggling women.

7:02 pm
On the way over to my girlfriend's, I finally take the call from my other woman, who has been blowing up my phone. I tell her I can only talk to her for a little while since I'm pressed for time. She reiterates her concerns and the fact that she is ticked off about me leaving the issue unresolved. I tell her we'll deal with it tomorrow and get off the phone with her abruptly making it appear like I'm angry about her insistence to pursue the conversation. In reality I could have cared less, but I needed to put her in check a little bit; her tenacity was getting out of hand.

7:28 pm
I pick up my girlfriend. We drive to the restaurant. With her its always a pleasant experience, almost makes me want to be monogamous, almost.

7:55 pm
We arrive at the restaurant and barely make the reservations. I can finally relax a little bit, even though my other woman is still calling me throughout the dinner. I turn my phone from vibrate to silent, this way I can tune her out completely.

8:55 pm
We get to the movies in time for the previews, find our seats and watch the plot unfold. I'm distracted, however, since this annoyance with my other woman is on my mind. I contemplate how to resolve this problem. Is it really worth for me to keep the relationship or should I give her the boot. I'm torn. Whenever I'm torn I know I'm in too deep and I should end it. So the decision gets made right there, when three hundred Spartans are beating the hell out of the Persian hordes; the other woman gets the boot later this weekend.

10:15 pm
The movie ends. On our way out I go to the bathroom and I check my voice mails. I have three of them from my other woman. The first two are angry, which I delete immediately without even listening to its contents. Her tone reveals everything I need to know about the state of her mind when she left me that message. The third one is a little more somber and coherent. She's apologizing for her behavior, saying she shouldn't have been so emotional and that she'll wait till tomorrow so we can talk it out. I am relived. The problem has sort of solved itself, at least for the night. Sometimes when you wait out a conflict with a woman, they have a tendency to come to their senses. Regardless, my decision still stands, it ends this weekend.

11:02 pm
We're back at my girlfriends house. We have a couple of drinks and then head straight for the bedroom, yea good times

1:55 am
My girlfriend wants me to spend the night. I debate whether I should or not because that will lead to a long morning of lounging around, perhaps even breakfast, but I have that "talk" scheduled with my other woman that I have to take care of in the morning. Don't forget I'm supposed to meet the booty call in the afternoon.

2:15 am
After fighting off my girlfriend's attempts to keep me there I finally get into my car to go home. I check my phone and I have a text message from my booty call asking me if I'm still up, this is her way of asking to fuck. On my way home I text her back and she calls me. Apparently her boyfriend went out with his buddies and he's drunk not answering her calls. She's pissed and wants to know if she can come over. This will lead to some angry revenge sex, which is always passionate and explicit. I'm tired but I take her up on her offer. I tell her to meet me at my house.

2:35 am
I arrive at my house and my booty call arrives about 10 minutes later. She comes in, complains a little bit about her man, and then we get down to it. She lingers around hinting that she wants to spend the night. I'm too tired to argue so I agree but I tell her she has to leave early because I have plans the next day. Usually I don't let any woman other than my girlfriend spend the night, but I make an exception. This girl is more paranoid about getting caught then I am, so I'm not too worried about any repercussions, plus she knows I have a girlfriend so there is no conflict there.

7:30 am
I wake her up and pretend like I'm getting ready to leave to get her out of my house. Once she leaves I go back to bed, I'm still exhausted. But hooking up with her late night works out for me, now I don't have any plans with her in the afternoon, allowing fmore time when I have the "talk" with my #2 girl. Oh joy.

There you have it; a typical day in the life of a cheater. It's a time consuming, mentally exhausting lifestyle, but you can't beat the benefits.

A.C.


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